We’re continuing on to guideposts 3 and 4 this week from Brené Brown’s book The Gifts of Imperfection. If you want to read more about the first two guideposts, then please click here.
The guideposts we will be exploring today are Cultivating a Resilient Spirit and Cultivating Gratitude and Joy.
Guidepost #3 Cultivating a Resilient Spirit
(Letting Go of Numbing and Powerlessness)
Most of us don’t like to feel the discomfort of painful emotions. In fact, when the emotions even start to rear their head, and there’s even the slightest feeling of welling up of emotions like a bubble in our throats, we try our best to push it away, escape the emotions, and unfortunately numb the joy with it.
When we actually learn to walk into emotion and understand that there is a start and stop to every emotion, and we won’t get stuck in an endless flow of Niagara falls, we can begin to embrace a resilient spirit.
There was a time in my life where I thought I couldn’t show emotions. Heck, I was the rock holding the whole family unit together, and if I were to lose it well, then who would pick up the pieces? I learned that my anxious behaviors and constant tasks were a form of numbing that provided the illusion that I was in control, but also greatly robbed me of Joy. When I walked into my story and owned it, I was no longer powerless. I had choices. I was proud of my wholehearted Inventory scale, which was about 70% now toward a Resilient Spirit.
Guidepost #4 Cultivating Gratitude and Joy
(Letting Go of Scarcity and Fear of the Dark)
When you’re in the pit of life and it feels like an impossible task to crawl out of your situation, it can feel like Gratitudes are just another thing on your To Do list. I remember thinking, Okay I’ll say my gratitudes, but I’m not gonna write them down. I would try to rush through them as a task that was somehow required rather than some type of mindful presence in the moment.
Then I remembered listening to multiple mindfulness and positive psychology gurus talk about the power of writing your gratitudes down. I know I must have reluctantly tried to participate in this at first, but like anything else, making this a priority helped me develop a practice that has changed my life.
Not only do I write down my gratitudes daily, but I also make a conscious effort to focus on the Wins in my day. When we’re wired for perfectionism, it’s so easy to forget the good you did, or the great things that happened around you in small moments, and only focus on what didn’t get done, or the negative encounter you had. By committing to daily gratitudes and focusing on my Wins, I have been able to push Scarcity aside. Believe me, Scarcity tries to encroach on my Joy often, and it’s only when I embrace Gratitude that I can let go of the dark. Today’s inventory indicates that I’ve crossed over the divide and am leaning about 65% toward Gratitude and Joy
Catch my Weekly Monday Gratitudes on Facebook or Instagram.
If you are interested in my upcoming October one-day workshop on The Gifts of Imperfection please click here for more information and to register.