Today we are going to be looking at two of my favorite guideposts in Brené Brown’s book The Gifts of Imperfection. I love these guideposts because they are two areas in my life that I have had to focus on immensely in order to tip the scale and become more wholehearted.
Guidepost # 7 Cultivative Play and Rest
Letting Go of Exhaustion as a Status Symbol and Productivity as Self-Worth
Play and rest seem like such easy concepts. Yet for perfectionists and people who worry about what others think, it is very difficult to let go and lean into relaxation. For years, the To Do List in my head was so full it would have been a herculean task to accomplish it. Still, I hustled with business and constant productivity while feeling resentful that other people in my life seemed to be able to relax and make the messes I felt compelled to clean.
When our worthiness is tied up in things we do, and the accolades we receive by accomplishing the impossible, it’s time to stop and identify what it means to be worthy regardless of what we produce. I have worked very hard to move into Play and Rest, and as a result, my judgment of others greatly decreased, and my ability to see and feel Joy increased 10 Fold.
Guidepost # 8 Cultivating Calm and Stillness
Letting go of Anxiety as a Lifestyle
Anxiety is something that we allow into our world when our thoughts, feelings and beliefs continue to spiral into a bad place. It’s either the fear that something bad will happen that is seen in catastrophizing, or the fear that there is something about us we don’t want others to see or know. Regardless…facing our fear and allowing ourselves to feel all the emotions is the path to calm. We can’t run from it!
The ability to access our ventral vagal state of safety and calmness in our parasympathetic branch of the nervous system requires attention, focus, and practice. So many of my clients struggle to slow down and even breathe, let alone sit in stillness with their thoughts. Yet when we learn to pull ourselves out of a constant state of sympathetic Fight and Flight, we balance out our nervous system and restore our body so we can handle the next Big Thing that comes at us.
If you are interested in my upcoming October one-day workshop on The Gifts of Imperfection please click here for more information and to register.