The Simple Things
We know we are supposed to eat right, exercise, and do activities that help eliminate physical and mental stress in our bodies such as mindfulness, yoga, meditation and breathing. Yet despite all the simple things we know are good for us, we procrastinate or avoiding these activities. Then we get stuck in anger, resentment, and disappointment when our life feels out of control.
Blame
Blaming others for our shortcomings is much easier than actually taking a hard look at our own accountability. I know I used to blame the business of motherhood and the responsibilities of managing a household and working full time, for all the stress and dissatisfaction I felt.
I also found great refuge in blaming my spouse for his ability to never worry, skate responsibility, and always be the life of the party, while I was the one trying to hold everything together. Not to mention how Foreboding Joy, or waiting for the shoe to drop, kept me in a constant state of anxiety and robbed me of the ability to find Joy in the present.
Complicated
Simple requires us to do something that feels uncomfortable. Showing up in our lives, acknowledging feelings of shame, and actually asking for help is simple and yet we make it complicated out of fear of what others will think.
In a world where we can hide behind screens, bury ourselves in the accomplishments of our career, and present our lives to others as if we had it all together, we prolong complicated. Then we worry, feel anxious or depressed, and never seem to be free from the yuckiness that lives inside us.
Simple is Freeing
If you’ve worked with me you know we start with Values and learn what guides us in our life. This is a simple road map…yet so many get lost because they ignore the map in front of them and choose to complicate their life instead of leaning into the things that bring them Joy.
Facing our past, addressing our feelings outwardly in the present, and learning how to regulate our emotions so we can circle back and lean into difficult conversations is not easy emotionally. However, the solution of what we know we are supposed to do is Easy! We make it complicated because we want to avoid the thing that we’re supposed to do in order to try to find another way around it. Yet instead of feeling peace, we justify our inability to ask for what we need and speak our truth, by festering in anger and anxiety because on the surface they seem easier than addressing the heart of the problem.
Let’s Get Back To Simple
When we choose to act and start behaving differently, we begin to recognize that simplicity is the answer. In order to take care of ourselves, we need to know what we need, what’s okay and what’s not okay, and be able to be brave enough to ask for help or set boundaries in order to do the simple things that bring our nervous system back in balance. It’s really that simple!